True Love's Imp
by Crysania
Summary: Desperate to win Lacey over so he can get Belle back, Mr. Gold goes to Charming for advice. Charming tells him to "show her the man she fell in love with." Gold takes this literally, much to Emma's and Charming's dismay.


"What the hell is he doing?" Emma asks David almost as soon as she steps into the Rabbit Hole. Gold there, talking to not-Belle, who is apparently now _Lacey_. Emma can't keep track of it all, no matter how hard she tries. Double identities, fairy tales and real world, and Belle was always just _Belle_. But now she's not. Regina, the Evil Queen of a fairy tale she grew up believing was _just that_, has somehow managed to curse her to these false memories. She remembers meeting Belle when she first appeared after the curse broke. She had been sweet, kind, a bit bookish. And she had apparently not quite been _sane_ because she loves Rumplestiltskin.

There are times, still, when Emma thinks she's stumbled into a rather long elaborate ruse, some Candid Camera gone wrong. Maybe it was like the Truman Show? They dump her into this strange little town and convince her magic is real and fairy tale characters are real and watch her interact with a man who believes he truly can spin straw into gold and a woman who wields apples like others wield a knife.

David glances over at her with something she's torn between calling a smirk and a grimace. "He's trying to pick her up."

"Dressed like _that_?" Emma has seen the pawnbroker in many different outfits, but all are variations on the same theme. Dark suit, shirt with matching pocket square, impeccably knotted tie, leaning just enough on his cane to make it apparent he did actually need it for walking. She wouldn't quite call him handsome, but there's a certain allure to him that she finds few in the town can deny. Like mobsters in old movies, people are drawn to the powerful man in the perfectly tailored suits.

But _this_? This is not quite what she would expect from him. He's dressed in leather. _Hook_ wears leather and he wears it well, never quite willing to remove that pirate's outfit despite being in the more modern, _real_ world of Storybrooke. The irony of a town called Storybrooke being the "real world" is not lost on her.

"Yeah." David nods as he speaks.

"Is that what Lacey is into?" She didn't know anything about this new persona of Belle's but so far as she could tell, _alcohol_ was what she was into. The woman had downed almost two shots in the time since Emma had shown up. Perhaps she would be just drunk enough to find Gold dressed in tight leather trousers, those ridiculous knee-high boots with, were those _heels_? She knows the pawnbroker is a fairly small man. When she wears heels she's taller than him. But she's never seen his short stature as bothering him in the least. He's intimidating despite it. Yet now he's wearing boots that give him an extra couples inches. She can't see what shirt he's wearing, but the coat over it is made of some strange leather, long, and with spikes.

"I have _no_ idea," David says and groans as he puts his head down on the bar for a moment. "I don't think I can bear to watch this."

"What is going on? This doesn't seem like Gold. Did you give him something?"

"Nothing more than some advice."

"You _told_ him to dress like that? Oh man, I really need to watch you folks like a hawk, don't I?" Emma leaps off the stool and starts to head toward Gold. Someone has to stop him from making a fool out of himself. David stops her though, his hand coming down to grip her shoulder and yank her back.

"I didn't tell him that," he mutters. "He came to me wanting to know how your mother and I managed to get together despite our cursed personalities." This makes sense to Emma. Well, it makes sense that they would have found a way, but it seems odd to imagine Gold going to anyone for romantic advice. "I told him to show her the man she fell in love with."

He lets the word hang and Emma turns back to look at Gold. He's gotten close to Lacey now, is standing on the other side of the pool table. He doesn't have his cane. In fact, he appears to be walking perfectly fine without it. Which is really saying something considering high boots and the heels. He stands with his hip slightly cocked out, one hand raised up in the air in a weird sort of flourish.

Emma leans closer, squinting a little. "Did he get a perm?"

David lets out a small snort of laughter and then shrinks back when Gold turns around to skewer them with his gaze. Emma looks away. She can't stand for him to see her laugh. He looks so _serious_.

"At least he looks human," David mutters.

"_Looks_ human?"

"In our world, we called him an imp. He had human form, but didn't look quite human He had these crazy eyes and scales…"

"Scales?" Emma shakes her head. This is _ridiculous_.

"Well, maybe not scales. I don't know what it was exactly. But his skin was this weird mottled looking stuff. I didn't get close enough to figure it out, but he was sort of a grayish-goldish color." David trails off and it's easy to see that he can't quite describe the imp-turned-human.

"Freaky."

"Yeah."

"And that's what…"

"Apparently Belle liked it." It was David's turn to shake his head and Emma can't quite understand what it is he finds so odd. She would have to see him to believe that it is truly unbelievable. Gold's not an unattractive man and he and Belle seem to fit together well. But what David is describing is, well, strange. In a world where reality is foggy to start with, this seems even more unusual than most things.

They watch as Gold approaches Lacey. The young woman looks him up and down, one hand on her hip. Gold gestures, more flamboyantly than they're used to, and then Lacey laughs. It's loud enough to hear from their place on the bar. Gold turns and stalks back to them.

"That didn't work," he mutters.

"What the hell has gotten into you?" Emma asks. He looks even more ridiculous from the front. His hair is crimped, still hanging to his shoulders but now in waves instead of straight. The shirt beneath his spiked coat is silk, with sleeves that flare out from the end of the coat. He's wearing a vest of some sort of brocade material. All is form-fitting.

"David suggested it," Gold says with a shrug.

"I did _not_."

"You said…"

"I know what I said." David runs his fingers through his short hair. "I didn't mean _literally_."

"Well, it's a bit too late for that now, isn't it?" Gold snarls back. Emma laughs. How can she not? Gold looks utterly ridiculous and apparently Lacey agrees.

"Are you going back in there?" Emma asks.

"_In_ there? If you mean am I going to approach Miss French again? I don't think so. Once was humiliating enough."

"Oh no, you don't." David reaches out and puts a hand on the other man's chest before he can get past him. "You asked for my help. You're getting it."

"You've done enough," Gold mutters and tries to shove away from David, but David holds tight, his hand splaying out over the other man's chest.

"Maybe if you changed?" Emma suggests, earning another glare from Gold. "What? It seemed like a good idea to me."

"Look, Gold," David says as he releases him. "You just need an in. Ask her out."

Gold gestures wildly, waving a hand at his body. "I'm pretty sure _this_ is not what Lacey wants. Perhaps some other time." He tries to move forward again, but David doesn't budge an inch.

"We're here now," David points out.

"I'm aware of that."

"You'll still owe me that favor." David says the last with a bit of a smirk. Emma knows that Gold _hates_ owing anyone anything. He likes them to owe _him_, likes to hold the mysterious _favor_ over their heads until he finally asks for some crazy thing or another, like taking a sorcerer on a plane to New York City. Crazy. That's what this whole world is. Sometimes Emma feels used to it. Sometimes she's pretty sure the whole damned thing is a dream she'll wake up from…eventually. Maybe she's in a coma. That would explain why the dream is so long. Is this the sort of weirdness that coma patients deal with?

"I think not," Gold says and the words are clipped. His eyes turn away from Emma and David, fall on the woman he knows as Belle, but who is going by Lacey.

David just grins. "Oh yes you will. I fulfilled my end of the bargain. Nothing said you had to get together with her."

Emma watches Gold's shoulders slump and it may be the first time she's ever seen him at a loss. He commands words like others command soldiers. They do _his_ bidding and not someone else's. She's seen him walk people into a trap without so much as breaking the slight smirk on his face. Today he looks like a confused teenage nerd wondering how to ask the most popular cheerleader to prom.

"Look," David says and for a moment he looks like he really _is _Gold's buddy. Prince Charming and Rumplestiltskin walk into a bar. There's a joke in there somewhere, isn't there? "You wanted my advice. Here's some advice. Belle loved you. I don't know why…" Here Gold raises a hand and Emma worries that he's going to turn the prince into a pig or a snail or whatever he's into these days. Magic is _real_ here and Gold seems to have the lion's share of the power in their little town. "She _loved_ you," David continues on as Gold's hand falls back to his side. "And she's trapped in there somewhere. You just have to find a way in."

Gold slumps just a little bit. "I'm not exactly the Prince Charming type," he mutters, waving a hand at, well, Prince Charming. The irony of the phrase is not lost on Emma, who lets out a slight bark of laughter.

David smirks. "You don't have to be. Seems that's not what Belle wanted." Emma realizes he's right. She remembers the _Beauty and the Beast_ tales.

"He's right," Emma says. "If Beauty could fall for a hairy beast, then Belle…Lacey…whoever she is…can fall for you in all this weird leather shit."

Gold responds with a slight snarl. Charming gives an exasperated sigh.

"You're playing wingman," Emma points out.

"I'm what?"

"Wingman. You're here to lend him support and _get him the girl_." Emma waves a hand toward Lacey, who is currently downing another Scotch and laughing at something the dwarf formerly known as Sneezy is saying. "So go." She puts a hand on David's shoulder and one on Gold's and turns them both away from her so that they're facing Lacey. "Go help him get that date." And she gives the pair a slight shove.

The two men share a look before doing as she bids. She can't resist following them at a discreet distance, deciding to stop some ten feet away and lean against the wall there, arms crossed over her chest.

By the time they get to Lacey, she's turned away and is fiddling with the jukebox. Gold pauses just a few feet away from her and glances back at David. Emma has never seen him look so nervous. She's surprised he's not pulling at the collar of his shirt and sweating bullets. She supposes it's a good thing that Gold is always so reserved because this helps him here. Only hidden somewhere in the depths of his eyes can she see how truly scared he is.

He starts to speak, clears his throat, and finally gets the young woman's name out. Lacey whips around, the curls sticking out of her messy bun flying out around her head before settling back down. "Mr. Gold," she says and Emma is shocked by the slightly sultry tone to her voice. She doesn't know Belle well, but she's always thought she was rather sweet, maybe a little innocent and strangely naïve considering she was in love with someone who they all call "The Dark One," whispering it to her as if saying it aloud will call him to them.

"Lacey," Gold says and his voice is a mere whisper.

Lacey puts one hand on her hip and raises an eyebrow. When she sucks her lower lip into her mouth and bites it, Emma watches Gold swallow hard. She almost laughs at the stricken look on his face.

"You remember him?" David asks, intervening in the slightly tense situation. Her father is not always as obtuse as others take him for. He has a keen sense of emotional issues and so his interjection at this moment is clearly welcome.

Lacey smiles. "Oh yes. He visited me in the hospital." She doesn't look away from Gold as she speaks.

The imp-turned pawn broker-turned imp grimaces. "Ah yes…that…"

"Sorry about your cup," Lacey murmurs, slight smirk still on her face.

He gives her an odd look and waves his hand in the air. "It's just a cup." He screws his face up oddly when he says the words. He stares at Lacey, a strange intensity in his gaze, as if he's expecting some sort of reaction. When he doesn't get it, he gives a small sigh.

"Right," Lacey responds with.

David puts his hand on Gold's shoulder. "Lacey…um…" He pauses and Emma just rolls her eyes. He's not used to this wingman thing, but he's trying. It's more than she could say for anyone else of Gold's acquaintance. "Look, I know you don't know Mr. Gold very well, but I think you should get to know him."

Lacey's eyebrows rise as she studies David for a moment before she looks back to Gold. "You have good friends, Mr. Gold."

Gold glances at David and Emma can't help but notice the strange look that crosses his face. She's not sure if it's a smile or a grimace, agreement or his being close to protesting. But the look passes quickly.

Lacey shoves away from the jukebox and steps closer to Gold. David steps away, giving them a bit of space. "Granny's." The simple word makes Gold light up like someone shoved a million watt light bulb up his ass. Emma chokes back a snort. "8:00pm." She starts to walk away but then stops, placing a hand in the middle of Gold's chest. In the middle of his _bare_ chest she realizes as shirt he's wearing is rather low-cut. Strange for a man, really, but the entire outfit makes him look like he's going to one of those comic conventions, role-playing as, apparently, _himself_. "Wear a suit," Lacey finishes with, smirking as she releases him and saunters out the door.

Emma wanders back over to where Gold and David are standing. David has a smirk on his face, arms crossed over his chest. "Good job, Don Juan."

Gold looks terrified. He's still staring after Lacey, his eyes wide and one hand pressed to the spot on his chest that Lacey's hand had left recently. He finally looks away from the door Lacey disappeared through. "Yes, well…" And here he raises his hand in that ridiculous looking flourish again. "Don Juan was nothing before he met me."

David lets out a snort. "Still, it seems you've got yourself a date, old man."

Gold shoots him another one of _those_ looks that Emma is pretty sure speaks to his dark past. "Indeed," Gold mutters. "No thanks to _you_."

David starts to protest but then holds his hands up in front of him, a gesture of surrender. "Sounds like you'd best go change." The words are dead-pan and Emma is amazed that the prince can manage such a serious look when she knows that he's holding back another laugh. She didn't think he had that in him.

Gold nods and it's left at that. He walks away. No, Emma notices. He doesn't simply walk. He _swaggers_. Or at least, he swaggers as best he can in that ridiculous outfit. It's hard to truly swagger while wearing high heels and leather pants. But it seems that Lacey's agreeing to the date has at least given him a bit of a confidence boost. Perhaps the date won't go quite so badly as she fears.

"So," Emma says, turning to look back at David.

"So," he echoes.

"Do we take bets?" She says this with a smirk. "I think he's going to fall on his ass."

"That's terrible," David murmurs. And then he pauses for a moment, eyes shifting to the side. "Fifty bucks says he gets a second date out of it."

Emma just laughs. "You're on." She starts to leave, setting her empty glass on the bar as she walks by. But then turns back toward David one last time. "Meet you at Granny's at 9:00pm?"

"Absolutely." And with one final laugh, Emma leaves the Rabbit Hole. This isn't quite how she had planned on spending her evening, but it sure is bound to be entertaining.


End file.
